My bed makes my back ache badly?

my bed hurts my back and when i sleep on the couch it feels alot better in the morning.but my husband is complaining that i dont go to bed with him.whos in the wrong?i mean it realy hurts hospital style but i just put up with it cos doctors just say take pain killers.i cant rest ive got 2 toddlers to look after every day.should i stay on the couch or suffer every morning just to suit my husband.

ive tried all that.i had a topper and it didnt do anything.went to an osteopath and he said my spine is curved and weak so i think im cursed forever

Just a few months ago, I was living your life. My bed hurt to sleep in and I was diagnosed with Degenerative Disc Disease as well as 2 herniated discs in my back. The couch was so much better to sleep on and my husband was always giving me grief over it. Finally we broke down and got a new bed and it's great. Look for the newer beds that do not have the metal springs in them with either a thick pillowtop or memory foam. You won't be disappointed and it will relieve the stress between you and your husband. Nobody really knows how bad back pain is except the person dealing with it and that is why your husband is having such an issue. Hopefully, a new bed along with some massage therapy or physical therapy can help your situation. Best of luck.

I too have been with a bad back called Spinal Stenosis which is arthritis in the lower back. We got a sleep number bed that you can either pump up to real firm or go down to very soft and I finally started sleeping well Report It

Get a new bed and before buying it, lie down on it for at least 15 minutes in every position you sleep in.

I suggest you change your bed...and if not your bed, your mattress. You are experiencing what i am...and i am actively doing something about it. Good luck to you.

Have you tried turning the mattress? or get a mattress topper to make it more comfortable.

Ask for a referral to a physio and get your back sorted out. Don't continue to take painkillers if the pain persists for more than a few weeks.

you need to turn your mattress regularly, sideways and top to bottom, if that doesnt work just buy a new mattress

buy a new bed

neither of you are in the wrong, you can't help pain. You need a new bed or matress or you could try one of those matresses that mould to your body

It sounds like it is time to get a new mattress. One that can be controlled by him and you so that you can have your sleep number and he can have his. He may need and like a harder more firmer mattress while you need a softer one or vice versa, but either way, it seems that a new mattress is in store so that you can move back in the room with your husband.

For the time being make it romantic and the two of you camp out on the floor by putting pillows, blankets and a blow up mattress so that you both can sleep together.

Your mattress is knackered. They don't last forever.

Get a new one. It's worth spending a bit more to get the sort that don't dip in the middle when you both lie on it. I think they're called memory mattress'

i used to put a board under my mattress when i had a bad back or lay on the floor,,,,but you being married that's going to be difficult can you come to some sort of compromise with your husband,,,over this,,,,he must know what pain your in,,,,

Have you considered changing your husband

I have to sleep on an adjustable bed because of my spine curving, this could be your solution but your husband may not like it. You could always try one of the memory foam mattresses such as Tempur as they are supposed to be very good and come highly recommended by most physiotherapists.

It sounds to me as though several things are happening here

1) You are under considerable stress with kids and hubby etc and so you are tense and your muscles will reflect this. Also, it is unlikely that you are having restful sleep due to the aforementioned problems! But when you sleep on the sofa, you are downstairs and so relax, you don't have to hear every little snuffle the kids make.

2) Maybe you need either a new mattress or new bed. If your partner is heavier than you, the mattress can suffer 'roll to' and this will also make you lie in unnatural positions to compensate for this. Also do you turn your mattress? You are suppose to do this about every three months, to ensure even wear. If the mattress is too hard or too soft, it will not support you correctly.

First of all, don't spend hundreds on a new bed or mattress, unless it is clearly in need of replacing. Try relaxation methods first... Get away for an afternoon now and again. Swimming is relaxing and supports every muscle, so does a massage!
Take time out for you, not the kids. It just may make all the difference.

I have misaligned vertebrae and scoliosis. Back pain is aggravated by a poor bed. Get a new one. Get the best you can afford. If a new bed is not possible due to cost. Get an old flush sapele door and put that on your mattress and under your mattress topper. Start saving. I am ordering a new bed Saturday - first one for nearly 20 years - I deserve it. you deserve one too! all the best.

try a 'tempur' mattress. they mould to the shape of your body and should give you the support you need.

im not sure what sort of bed to suggest but you deff have to change it.. Please dont rely on painkillers or your body will become prone to them, dont get addicted okay.. And hey its only fair that your hubby wants you to be with him..

if you sleep lying flat on your back then why not try changing your position, start sleeping sideways, its been said that its good to sleep lying on the right hand side but you choose whichever, sideways either the right or the left.

I think that it is now time for you to go and buy yourself a new bed.

ooo i have exactly the same problem so i cant answer your question but i sympathise and will watch your answers!! xx